Well, that was wild

Life is so funny sometimes.

Don’t you think? It’s the unexpected in the midst of the seemingly expected, as if we can know what every single day will look like simply because we ‘have a plan’ for the day.

Nope.

It’s much more fluid and magical and unpredicting than that. It’s hard to remember that sometimes, at least for me, the provision comes in so many forms. Sometimes I get in a rhythm of life and somehow feel like ‘this is all it will be forever’, dramatic, I know.

But maybe you can relate and I’m not actually the only one?

I’m reminded today of the incredible unpredictable nature that life really is. As I’m going about my own journey of working through my own barriers and effing made up stories and limiting beliefs that lie under the surface, a few things have happened that I couldn’t have planned or orchestrated myself and I wanted to share. #storytimewithdana

First Up.

Bear has been acting really weird lately, defiant almost but also what feels like him becoming more scared of the world. Lord, help me! I don’t even know what it is yet but he’s, off. So instead of fighting him to go on a walk (like, since when does he even do that?!), I let him lead. We go in one direction across our apartment complex and he immediately takes us in another.

I follow.

Then he takes us in another, then quickly in another, and one more which has us heading back to the apartment. We basically didn’t even leave the complex!

I follow. Curious about where he wants to go and more open to where we end up.

He goes straight to the garage. I try to walk passed the garage to go up to the apartment, and nope, stops right at the garage door.

You see, I have plans today! Errands to run, my 4Runner to get worked on, a coaching call to have and those things didn’t involve taking the dogs along with me.

And yet, here we are. At the garage and in the back of the truck, as I’m contemplating - “Do I take them, do I not? They’re rowdy when we go places and I’m really not feeling up to making a scene at the dealership and I gotta be there in 30 minutes.”

“Looks like we’re going!”

We had enough time to hit up Starbucks for a coffee and hang in the back of the 4Runner (cue the expression of a previous dream ;) ) until the appointment. We go, we sit, we leave, we get to the appointment and instead of an incessant amount of bark whining to get out of the car, the boys are just looking around at all the people quietly. Whew, wipes brow, I don’t have to navigate two barking dogs in the service station with 20 people around at the Toyota dealership!

Next.

Just like that I’m on to the next thing. We try and walk home, Bear pulls us in the direction of Natral Grocers which for us now means we don’t have enough time to make it back to my apartment for my scheduled call. In the midst of Bear pulling and us being still, a nice lady who starts to approach us but quickly realizes the space we’re wanting to keep begins to tell me she has two dogs just like mine and wants to share pictures.

Bear and Mac at this point have been sitting right beside me not barking and not having any reactive episodes. And after showing me her dog pictures she says, “Well, your boys are so very well behaved. Have a good day.“

Two moments, different reflections back from the outside world, both demonstrating how well they are actually doing and my first thoughts were, “Well, you didn’t see them this morning when Bear had a reactive episode to a dog walking 50 feet away.”

Instead of receiving the compliment and the truth of what’s being reflected back to me by strangers, that all the hard work I HAVE been putting into their training over the years is paying off, my first instinct is for it all to not be enough despite this little snippet in time.

So in the last 2 weeks of being EXTRA hard on myself about my dogs, today I get two moments I couldn’t have planned for of reminders that all the hard work IS paying off. That we are getting better and that we’re doing okay!

Provision.

Next One.

I have a coaching call and in my deeper desire to breakthrough some patterns of my own including getting more curious about why I’m so hard on myself, I discover the wounding of where this unloveable belief comes from. Not as an excuse or to blame, instead as an opportunity to acknowledge, work through, release, and let go.

Provision.

Last but never least.

Because there’s still 1/2 a day left! I go to the dog park with a friend, we had a blast! We threw tennis balls at each other trying to dodge each one from the other and just played!

The Universe knew I needed a pick me up.

We leave, he usually gets soda on the way home but wasn’t planning on it this time then makes a last minute decision right by the light to turn and go into the gas station.

Whew, my heart just picked up it’s pace as I’m recounting this story.

We’re always laughing and I’m always doing something to embarass him at this particular convient store so today is no different, embarassment ensus. We get in line which happens to be the longest line I’ve ever seen at this place, usually we’re in and outta there so quick.

So in the line we stand and in walks my ex.

Talk about timing.

An ex that I care very deeply for and had one last-ish thing on my heart to express that I never got the chance to.

Also, unlike me. I don’t hold on to things very long and I’m usually very clear and fully expressed with how I feel and sharing what’s true for me.

So I stand there, staring, watching him walk in and knowing that he’ll see me. I mean, we’re RIGHT THERE in line. What am I gonna do, go hide behind the cheese it’s?!

I also don’t hide or really run away from things in my life, so there’s that.

Back to the story.

Well, that was wild! What are the friggin’ chances of all of those mini moments that would puzzle piece themselves together today to collide in that way.

I don’t know why life works like that and honestly I don’t need to know. I’d rather be awed and surprised.

The thing I wanted to say, I said it. The things I wanted to share very clearly, I shared them. And from the bottom of a deeply grounded truth within my whole being. Finally, nothing has been left unsaid.

Freedom.

Provision.

Connection.

Closure.

——————————————————-

Moving Forward.

Slowing down enough to see the provision that comes in so many forms to heal the places and spaces within that we sometimes know and that we sometimes don’t. It’s in these mini unpredictable pieces of life, second by second, that miraculous moments exist if we’re willing to see them. If we’re willing to be with them. If we’re willing to carry them forward.

Provision always resides. I believe that fully. I may forget from time to time especially in the darker spaces of this experience but even in the midst of my forgetting that always ends up being the truth.

Here’s my invitation.

Where in your life today, just for today, can you attune your focus to notice where provision is already residing over you right now?

It might not be on your timing or in the timing of what you deem to be the best. But who knows, maybe there is actually a better time, another time.

I’m curious what you’ll discover!

Cheers to listening in and adventuring this wild life together!